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tiri kugadzira kuti site iyite fast. ichamboita ichifa, but ndezva nhasi chete

Zvituko

Rodney Kudzayi Musariri 

- Mese kusviba kunge vanhu vanonhonga mabhonzo  

Ashley Chimbarami 

- Eddy nzeve dzakaramwa musoro.
- Mukamwa mune man`a!

Christine Matambo 
- Kuonda kunge nhunzi irikubva kunozvara
- Vakayi, kusviba zvekuti ukabata mwana anobva arara achifunga kuti kwadoka  
- You are so old zvekuti you have photos of Adam and Eve as your classmates

- Matama anenge pfuko dzehwahwa hwepandari 

- Demba,wakasviba zvekuti ukapfurwa bullet rinodzoka richiti ndashaya munhu 

- Ma lips anenge bumper regonyeti 
- Kumeso kunenge foot print ye dhadha 
- Mudhara wako ndibuilder asi munorara muchamber.


Chanetsa Mukahanana
- Kushata kunge ndowe yatsikwa nebhazi
- Door renyu ndere banana zvikanzi gogogoi, hamuti pindai, munoti "Menyai"
- Kumusha kwenyu kunonaya hwahwa, chibage chinokura chakadhakwa
- Baba vako imonya vanogeza neblanket.

Frank Mungure 

- Tsapfu dziri muhapwa.
- Kushata kunenge chembere yakagarira tsono ichidya malemon.

- Maziziso anenge nhunguru dzisina kuibva

Paddington Dzikamai Phiri 

- Kushata kunenge chigubhu che Mazoe chakatsva! 
- Kushata kunenge chembere yakatarisa kuzuva
- Ndosaka wakareba zvekuti ukagumburwa nhasi unozodonha mangwana 
- Ndosaka wakanyepera ambuya vako kuti corner nechishona inonzi "nzvee"
- Mumba menyu muri two asi unochemera kurara pakati

Erhuardt Muchemwa 

- Matama kunge dumbu redafi.
- Mhino inenge chibhakera chaMike Tyson 


Adelaide Chikuhwa Mukahanana 

- Une mawoko eMargarine asi unofarira kudziya moto

Tawanda Shangwa 
- Ndebvu dzinenge kabroom kakupera!

- Wakanzi uuye ne any old stuff kuchikoro iwe wakuenda naambuya vako!

Faffy Maphosa 

- Unongoti ziguvhu renge mhodzi yekotapeya

Tau Kurebwa 

- Une bhutsu dzeround dzakanyorwa kuti fembera fembera mberi ndokupi

Marshall Tonderai Chisango  
- Mazino anenge mapadza evaroyi

Baynham Tanaka Goredema 

- Mateya anopinda jongwe richitamba chitekete
- Kusviba kunenge pasi pepoto yeroja
- Mhino dzinopinda matatya achitamba codesa 


Vakayi Tawengwa 

- Tsapfu dzine matumbu 
- Kuwonda kunenge huku yakapfeka skin tight

Tawz Pokerhontus 

- Your mama is so fat two cars can park in her shadow 



Varume vachimwa scud

Raimwiwa zvaro doro ari manheru vakagara varume  richitenderera gaba redoro .Rakazoti rotenderera kechi 3  Dube ndobva anzwa asara nechinhu mumuromo ndobva abvisa nechigumwe akatarisa akaona muriwo akarasa ndokunyarara zvake gaba rikatenderera  akamwazve ndokunzwa asara nechimwezve ndokupfira muruoko ndokutarisa  akaona isadza zvikamnetsa akaswedera pedo neshamwari yake ndokuzevezera zvikanzi nhy Moyo doro iri murikurihwa cei zvikanzi naMoyo nenzwi riripasi usataurisa ndini ndarutsira mukati ..

Zvirwere zvepa bonde

Ndakaenda kumusha kwa madam yangu ne mwana wangu musikana in grade 1 Tina. Tasvika my inlaw (ambuya) vakatitambira ndokupinda nesu mumba(an african hut).ndakapihwa stool yekugara. Ambuya ndokutora bonde(rukukwe) kuti Tina agare, "gara hako muzukuru...", vakadaro ambuya vangu, asi Tina akaramba akamira, "Ko chii?", ambuya vakabvunza.
Tina anopindura zvinyoronyoro.."NDOTYA ZVIRWERE ZVEPABONDE"

Usada kundifadza nenhema

Wife: Handichadi hangu, ndakuenda kumba kwedu, Sara hako uchandifunga rimwe zuva, mangwana chaiye ndiri kuenda
Hubby: Handidi munhu anoda kundifadza nenhema.

Tezvara vane mhanza

Ndanyara wena. Ndakagara nababa vemukadzi (tezvara) vane mhanza, kamwana kangu kane 3 years karikuvarova mhanza kachiti: "Iwe sekuru enda kunogerwa zvakanaka buda muno"

Chimbomirai kupa imbwa sadza

Guys ndibatsireiwo ndaenda kwaMbuya vaSta, amai vamai Sta, mudzimai wangu, ndapihwa sadzandiri kudya. 
Zvino ndirikunzwa vachisheedzera vari ku kitchen kuti, 'chimbomirai kupa imbwa chikafu mozo sanganisa nerinenge rasiiwa nababa vaSta'.
Apa ndiri kusvinyanga musuwa wekupedzisira mundiro hamuchina chinhu, ndodini?

Type dzeShamwari

  1. shamwari dzinongokutsvaga kana dzakabroker dzichida chikwereti asi dzisingazodzose
  2. shamwari dzinoti kana dzikakutsvaga wotoziva kuti mangwana une bhabharasi (kunwa chete hapana kuvaka)
  3. shamwari dzinovaka kusvika pakusakupa kana mukana wekuzvifungirawo wega
  4. shamwari dzekuti uchingopedza kumuudza nyaya wotoziva kuti waudza munhu wese (aljazeera network)
  5. shamwari dzekuti ukaziva kuti arikufonerana nemurume/mukadzi wako wotonzwa mudumbu (chihure chisina bhaundhari)
  6. shamwari yekuti unoziva kuti kana munhamo iripo, shamwari chaiyo inodiwa nemunhu wese
  7. shamwari yekuti munenge mungori mucompetition, unototya kutaura kuti wapromotwa
  8. shamwari inonyepa zvekuti heyi
  9. shamwari inongokutsvaga pafacebook ichida kuona kuti uri kuita nezvei
  10. shamwari inongokutsvaga kana zvinhu zvichifamba kuti ivhaire kana zvakapressa mazuva iwayo hauibate

Bond Notes: kubuda color

Zvenyu zvekut munowerenga Mari uchiisa mate pachigunwe zvapera!! Ku Bond note chigunwe chosara chiri Green kunge wanga uchitemha Nyevhe

Bond Notes - roja rajamuka

Dear Roja

Mari yangu ndoida in US$ not in bond notes


Reply

Dear landlord

Kana imba yenyu ikuAmerica ndichakupai US$ asi kana iri muzimbabwe ndichakupai bond note.

Bond Notes - kukumbira mari

Yedu yekukumbira Mari pagroup re family iyi, nhasi ndati kunamai vaMadam vangu Mhamha ndokumbirawo  'bond' foni yangu yabva yanyora 'bonde' vanhu vese vari kupopota. Ndabva ndabudiswa mugroup.

Bond Notes: Mazita anoenderana nenguva yatiri

Kune wachangobara kana warikutarisira, hawo maazita anofambirana nenguva:

  • Bondnashe
  • Tawanabond
  • Tabondwa
  • Bondmore
  • Bondwell
  • Bondelina
  • Bondlyn
  • Bondikelelo
  • Tabondzwa
  • Takubondwa
  • SimbanaBond
  • Bondknows
  • Bondfree
  • Bondward
  • Bondson
  • Bondington

Bond Notes: Tsumo dzema bond

Tsumo dzema Bond Notes:
  1. Ane  kwacha ane  mari hazvienzane neane bond
  2. Charovedzera charovedzera bond rakapinda muZimbabwe kwakachena
  3. Igaroziva kuti bond hari crosse border
  4. Mudzimu wakupa bond wati nhunzi dzikudye
  5. Ane bond peta muswe kuti ane US Dollar akutye
  6. Aive ma bearer ave mabond
  7. Matakadya US Dollar haanyaradze uyo akabata bond
  8. Kure kwe US Dollar ndiko kusina bond
  9. Kudada kwevari America kukumbira vari Zimbabwe Bond
  10. Akupa  US Dollar ndewako .

Bond Notes: Mighty Warriors bond score ku Cameroon

Mighty warriors scored vakarambirwa hanzi score renyu harishande kunoku iBond score.

full story: http://www.herald.co.zw/mighty-warriors-robbed-in-yaounde/

Masasi ekupenga: Mitauro yandinogona

Babie ndinotaura 3 ma Languages (mitauro)

  • Shona
  • Rough
  • NeNhema

Zvinhu zvinoratidza kuti hawusati wava nemari

12 Things that will let you know kuti hausati waita mari, imbodzikama.
1. Ukaona uchivhunduka murungu
2. Ukaona uchiri kutenga mu shop/supermarket inobvunzwa receipt pa door
3. Ukaona mu Phone yako musina kana one message ya teacher na headmaster vemwana wako.
4. Ukaona uchigara imba ine ma burglar bars
5. Ukaona uchigara muimba ine sitting room inedoor rinonanga mu main bedroom
6. Ukaona uchidyira mu sitting room uyezve mumba mako musina dining room ne table yacho.
7. Ukaona une musikana webasa one uyezve ari iye anoita futi zve garden nekugeza mota
8. Ukaona uchidira fuel ye $5 zvichidzika
9. Ukaona mumba menyu muchidya type one yenyama pa meal uyezve muchidya more than 1 loaf pa Zuva. Chingwa hachifanire kuwanda kudarika zvinoiswa pakati pechingwa.
10. Ukaona kwaunogara kusingawanikwe ma billboards e perfume
11. Ukaona uchi scratcher airtime kuti u juice 
12. Ukaona bank manager asina phone number yako mu phone make.