Independence box - kuda zvinhu

Boy:lndependence box babe
Girl:Aaaa unoda independence box wakarwa hondo here iwe?
Boy:kkkkk 
Girl:ko wasekei 
Boy:lwe zvaunondinetsera Christmas box wakamborovererwa pamuchinjikwa here 

Interview yemunhu ari kutsvaka basa ne demo

Unomunyima sei basa akadai uyu......
In an interview:

Q: Vakuru, basa riripano nderekutema nekugobora miti, manje hameno kana makamboriita before because rinoda physical fitness, makamboshandawo here basa rakadai?
A: Yah, ndobasa rangu chairo, ndakarishanda kwemakore.
Q: Maishanda kupi?
A: Ndakasevenza ku, ku, ku, kwainzi ku, ku Kalahari Forest, ku Botswana.
Q: Do u mean 2 say Kalahari desert?
A: Heya imi munoziva rava desert ka? Raiva sango rese riya, tisu takaritema kusvika rizonzi desert.
Q: So for how long did u work there? I mean your experience?
A: 34 years!
Q: How old are you?
A: Ndine 28 years.
Q: So how come kuti your work experience is more than your age?
A: Ndairova maovertime

Pastor vachitaura nezveDenga mu kereke


Pastor: Today i want to talk about heaven,
Interpretor: Nhasi ndikuda kumbotaura nezvedenga, 
Pastor: Not about the sky,
Interpretor: Kwete zvedenga,
Pastor: Not about the roof,
Interpretor: Kwete zvedenga
Pastor: Not about the ceiling,
Interpretor: Kwete zvedenga,
Pastor: But about heaven.
Interpretor: Asi zvedenga.

Unobuda wanzwei ipapa shuwa?

Ma symptoms eEbola nekubatirwa foni

Masymptoms eEbola akafanana nezvinoitika kana murume akabatirwa fone nemukadzi:
  • Kudikitira
  • Nyoka kurira mudumbu
  • daerhea
  • Kubvunda
  • Nekuona tunyeredzi uye kupera simba

Masasi ekupenga - Munyama chaiwo

Hameno kuti munyama here kana kuti chii...ndanhonga Mari but yakashota

svomhu: 5 anopinda kangani muna 20

Teacher : Temba, 5 anopinda kangani muna 20?
Temba: kunoitei? 
Teacher: i maths, weka tione 
Temba: kana muchinakidza,anogona kupinda kana ka 10, asi kana muchibhowa anopinda ka 1

Ndini Kero

Inzwa conversation iripano:
Mukomana aida kutaura nechimoko asi changa chisina fone, so akafona pane yababa wacho.
Baba: haloo
Muface :halo ndingataure wo na stella
Baba: ndiwe ani
Muface: ndini Kero
Baba: unoti ndiwe Caro anenzwi rechirume manje hausi kuzotaura naye kana usina kundiudza kuti ndiwe ani
Muface: inga ndirikutaura wani kt ndini Kerovhini

Ndofunga matorisvina

Nhamo akati achiyamwa mazamu ehure rake ndokunzwa ave kutomedza mukaka ndobva abvunza:
"Ko nhai  babie asi unoyamwisa mwana mucheche kani? "
Hure ndokupindura, "aiwa  daddy  ndine zimota pazamu iroro saka ndofunga matorisvina." 

Tsoka dzerwendo - Aleck Macheso

Message kubva kumuimbi wedu wemuseve, Aleck Macheso:

Admin ndokumbirisa undiudzirewo vanhu veMasvingo kuti album rangu rinonzi 🏼"TSOKA DZERWENDO" kwete kuti vafambe vachitaura kuti "SHOKA DZEGWENDO", please please🏼 haikona kuramba muchikanganisa wozve album rangu vanhu veMasving.Sezvamunoita kana matadza kuenda Gweru, kuti gwendo gwegweru gwagugwa negugwe

Chinoz - maiwe kani

Simba : big, bigger, biggest.
Chipo : small, smaller, smallest.
Tanaka: tall, taller, tallest
Chinoz : mai, maiwe, maiwekani

Uri mbudzi here?

Musikana atizira: Baba ndauyawo ndine nhumbu ya John
Baba: Wabvepi
Musikana: KuBikita
Baba : Ko John wakamuonepi
Musikana : Ku village kwedu achitsvaga mbudzi
Baba: Saka iwe uri mbudzi here?

ZINARA Easter Message

"Don't drink and drive this holiday please because nema potholes ariko aya unozorasa doro rako."

and then rako!

Monya ichi flexa mamhasuru mu bhawa

Monya yakapinda mubhawa ikaona mupfana akabata quart ikasvikomubvutira ndobva yatanga kunwa. Yava pa half yakatarisa mupfana uya ikaona achichema ikati  urikuchemei. Zvikanzi nemupfana mukoma wangu munyama wangu wanyanya. Kuswera zuro ndakaedza kuzvisungirira tambo ikadambuka, nezuro ndakaenda ndikanogara kunjanji chitima hachina kuuya, nhasi ndoisa poison mudoro rangu imi monditorerawo futi aaaaaa zvandirwadza

Fembera fembera

baba vanoita ma jokes nemwana vasvika kumba fembera fembera kuti ndakuigirei mwanangu mwana anoti masweets daddy voti nzvee ndakuigira mabook mwana anodaroo kuna baba vake daddy fembera fembera kuti pasi pemubhedha panei daddy voti bhutsu mwana oti nzvee panasabhuku

Mari haikwani

pana amai vanevana vavo vatatu vanotambira $2000 na house girl anoda $80na gadern boy$70 first born anoenda kuvarsity anoda $800 second born ari kucollege anoda $650 third born ari form four anoda $250 apa vanodya chikafu che $50per month! aah izvavakutoda vanogona maths kufunga kwako amai vanoshandira mari pamwedzi