MASASI EVANHU VAKATIZA XENOPHOBIA
1)EJOZALE HAKUNA ZVESE IZVI.
2)UMM MINA MUSANDIISIRE ROMI
PACHINGWALE.
3)KATI KUNO HAKUCHABATI SABC EISH
MAKASARA.
4)CHINGWA KUITA R10 CHINOMBOISWA
CHIIKO CHINGWA CHACHO.
5)ZVINHU ZVAMUNAZVO MUNO MUMBA
HAZVITIMBOSVIKI PAHALF YEZVANGU
ZVAKAPISWA NEMBWA DZEKUSOUTH.
6) TWIZA MINA HANDIBATI INWAI ZWENYU.
7) INI NDAJAIRA KUKWIRA MATAXILE
ZVEMAKOMBI ZVINONETSA
8) 15c PER MINUTE IYI NDOINONZI
DAYLIGHT ROBBERY CHAIYO KUSOUTH
HAKUNA ZWESE IZWI
9)MINA SHONA INONDIVHEKISALE
10)KHATI MARI YEMUZIM YAKUNZI MABOND
COIN
Kana wakaita izvi, wachembera:

  1. Watched Mvengemvenge Ezomgido by Eric night
  2. Watched macguiver,21 jump street tour of duty and Neighbours, Chips
  3. Sang Ishe Komborerai Africa
  4. Ate ma doink and viscos
  5. Drank Tarino
  6. Used a 5cent coin that had a rabbit
  7. Tear sandcooler in half to share with your fried
  8. Used sand as an antiseptic
  9. Your first television set was black n white called Giant or  President.
  10. You can sing Ndochi
  11. Once ate mango and salt
  12. Kuwachira Carpet pamsoro pemba.
  13. Kutumwa kunotenga chingwa wotenga sliced wodya mapiece 2 epakati.
  14. Kuba salt mumba uchida kudya mabhurumango mambishi awaienda kunoba pamaraini penyu.
  15. Kuita game rekuvhura magazine uchiti page iyi ndeyangu rekuside uko nderako.
  16. Kumisa bhazi pabus stop pasina vamwe rakamira wotiza uchiseka.
  17. Kutumwa kumashops kunotenga madrinks maEmpty ari mupaperbag achifamba achirira road yose.
  18. Kukwira muti wotanga kudriver uchiti ibhazi.
  19. Kunotamba bhora nevamwe team yako yakadyiwa woti handichada ndipei bhora rangu ndakuenda kumba.
  20. Kuzora mafuta pamusoro peshena.
  21. Kugadzira bhora rezvikweshe rinedombo pakati woti vapfanha vakike!
  22. Kusunga huswa munzira kuti vamwe vadonhe.
  23. Kuisa salt pasi perurimi kana waita mhosva kuti ukarohwa ufende!
  24. Ukadenhwa term ichitanga wozogarira munhu wacho pagedhi rechikoro musi wekuvhara
  25. Kuba nzimbe kumaraini asi kumba kwenyu dziriko.
  26. potato crips zaza the stalet mama chomupikini puzzi the dog
  27. Ukanzwa Jarzin man woziva kuti ndakubuda mumba kuenda kuchikoro.
  28. Kutswanyirana sweet ne dombo 
  29. kunoona wwf panext kana une shena hawaibvumirwa kupinda
  30. Kana wakambopfeka PRO-SPORT OR Grasshooper

Boy :  Hesi shaa
Girl  :  Hi
Boy :  Unonzani?
Girl  :  Tammie
Boy :  Ndo zita rako rese?
Girl. :  Aiwa....
Boy :  Ropedziswa sei?
Girl :  Tamamanenhamo.
Mbiri ye nzvimbo
                                     
1. Bulawayo - okapi knife🔪, shabhini 🍺🍻🍺
2. Mutare mheni
3. Gokwe varoyi👽
4. Murehwa ngoma📦
5. Mt Darwin runyoka🐍
6. Kwekwe amakorokoza 💎
7. Shurugwi makorokoza 💎 mhondi 🔪🔫💂
8. Gutu vanhu vakapusa
9. Binga vanhu vakasara vanoda mbanje🚬 stereki
10. Shamva mahure👩 asina utsanana🛀🚿
11. Bunket, centenary - zvigure👿
12. Gweru chando 💨
13. Zaka, chipinge varoyi👽                  
14 mtoko mapuno
15. masvingo kudhura💰 kuroora👰 💍 + kuchekeresa💘
16 Marondera huchi🍘
17 chivi vasikana👭 vakashata
18 Nyanga bananas 🍌🍌🍌
19 Chiweshe vaporofita👼
20. Harare ....ndokwatirikuitira reseach🌐📚💻 yacho.
Iwe👈 unobvepi?
Jarzin chirongwa chemadhora "vaChinotimba, mubvunzo wekupedzisira mobva matora mari... 'munhu anozviuraya nekuzvisungirira neChirungu zvinonzi chii?"
Chinoz: haa zvakapusa izvo... "Tie and Die".
Ba Tindo vachipembedza mwana wavo mu kombie vanhu vakanyarara.
Tindo : "dady apa ndopanonzi pagomo hospital handiti?"
Ba Tindo: " yes mwanangu"

Kombie yati fambe fambe vachitaura nemazwi ari pamusoro vanhu vese vakanyarara. 

Tindo: " dady apa ndopa ZBC panoverengwa news handiti" . 
Ba Tindo: ndizvozvo chaizvo mwanangu u are very clever keep it up boy". 

Kombi yapinda mutown mwana akadeedzera zvekare. 

Tindo:"dady this is Rezende street corner Charter handiti?". 
Ba Tindo: " argh u are very clever unotokunda vamwe varume vakuru kuziva harare" 
Apa mwana anga amera zenze manje . 
Tindo:" Dady apa ndopa Harare Central Police Station patakauya kuzokuona na mhamha masungwa maramba kubhadhara hure handiti?"

Baba vakabva vati zii kunga vasipo


Munamato waDredhi:
Almight jah in the heaven pihwai sando dzenyu mdhara bcoz munotispakira mazhets ese tipeiwo mhasuru dzemweya kuti satani asatiuraire bhasikoro,anofanira kuziva kuti hamuite hamuite paanozocheka masettings anofanira kushaya kuti zvinhu zvacho zvirikumbofambasei tokusimbisai bigtym mdara god tobatana later muzita remudhon wenyu jesu ndasasa.
Amen
10 mitemo yechikweshe:

1. Akafuta ndiye keeper
2. Bhora rinopera kana vanhu vaneta
3. Nyangwe game riri 20 - 0 vanopedzesera kugowesa ndivo vahwina
4. Hapana referee 
5. Hakuna offside
6. Muridzi webhora akatsamwa game rapera
7. The best 2 havafanirwe kutambira same team, ndivo vanosarudza maplayers
8. Anokavira bhora kure ndiye anonorinhonga.
9. Kana pane score isina kunzwisisika, either inobvumwa or panorohwa penalt
10. Zvinomakisa kuita wekupedzisira kusarudzwa nekuti unenge usingabatsire
Teacher says kuvana, 'anenge atanga kupindura mubvunzo wangu correct anobva aenda kumba, '
jojo dofo achibva aridza tsamwa zvikanzi na ticha Ndiani aridza tsamwa, zvikanzi na Jojo, ndini, bye bye ndaenda ini....
Imwe couple ndokuuya ku High Court for a dirvoce:
Judge: Hamuchadanani zvachose chose hre?
Man: Hongu mambo.
Woman: Chokwadi changamire.
Judge: Mune vana vangani?
Woman: Three.
Judge: How do u want the children shared.
Panoita runyararo, votanga kukakavadzana
murume nemkadzi. After some 30 mins they come
back.
Vose: Give us time, taakunoita mumwe mwana,
then we share equally, kkkkk

Haipereri ipapo. After nine months, the woman
gave birth to twins kkkkkkkkkk
Vamwe bhudhi vaitengesa mavegetables kumarket. Kwakauya murungu akathenga neR100 manje bhudhi Havana change. 
Bhudhi kwakuti kumurungu money is together murungu akati what? 
Bhudhi vakati money is meeting, murungu akati: I don't understand. 
Bhudhi vakati money is mixed murungu kwakuti I can't get you 
Bhudhi vakati money is in a relationship, murungu akati come again 
Bhudhi vakati money is joined murungu akati please explain 
Bhudhi vakati money is one. Murungu akati I beg your pardon 
Bhudhi vakati: R1 is here R2 is here R5 is here R10 is here R20 is here R50 is here   achinongedzera R100) akati they are the team.
MaZimbabwe munoda zvinhu everything you want it double double unonzwa kuti '' Ndeipi Ndeipi sei sei Bhoo Bhoo , low low, sharp sharp,still still,heavy heavy, Gud Gud, hauite hauite, tapinda tapinda, murape murape, chele chele, kepe kepe, ola ola, chek chek, heya heya, takaipa takaipa, lazy lazy,waya waya, kiya kiya, take take, zakaria zakaria, ndekapi ndekapi, ha ha umm umm, bye bye
LETA OF STOPING JOB.

Dear bhosi

I ryt this leta to refuz job as gardenboy. Enafu is enafu! Yu didi not add money from long ago. U giv mi young money witch can only by 5 pakets of shuga. Evry moon yu giv mi envilope, I open only to c young money inside. One de I wek ap let bcoz i was seek, madam kik me lyk soka. My board was hate lyk I waz bitten 619 race-ling. This is ova, am also a woman beeing.

Yrs fatefuli

Braai-tone
Zesa & zinwa dai vari vana vangu ndaiiendesa ku children's home vana vepi vanouya mumba nguva yavanoda
Vamwe vana vakaoma chokwadi... Mumwe mukomana akatumwa namdhara kunotenga 5kgs dzenyama pakudzoka ndokusangana  nebaby rake zvikanzi nebby 'nyama waiwanepi'? 
zvikanzi nemukomana ndeyekubutcher kwedu kana uchida tora iyi ini ndonotora imwe.
Mukomana akanosvika kumba asina chinhu . Baba vaye vainge vakagara mumba namufundisi zvikanzi nababa mwanangu wauya nenyama here zvikanzi hongu baba
zvikanzi rega ndirodze banga tiicheke. 
Baba vachibuda panze mwana ndokuti kuna mufundisi nyama irikutaurwa nababa ndimi murikurodzerwa banga iro , mufundisi vachinzwa izvi ndokutora bhasikoro ravo  vakananga kumba mwana ndokumhanya kunababa zvikanzi murikurodza henyu banga
asi nyama yatizwa nayo namufundusi. Baba ndokutanga kumhanyisa mufundisi  achishevedzera 'mira nenyama unofunga kuti unotiza ukasvikepi banga ndarodza kare'.