mari - Nyambo dzino kodza mwoyo

Wasu va chidya mari

Vakomana paweekend takadye mari, takabve muHarare ndokusvika paMarondera kwakuspende fifte, kwakusvika paHeadleands kwakuspende fifte futi, tichibva tamboite rest paChristmas pass kwakuspende fifte, tasvika maMutare kuti tiproceede kuende bocha kwakuspende fifte, tichangobude maMutare kwakumire pane imwe township kwakuspende fifte fiuti, tikati arume ngatimbocalculator finance yataspenda wanike iya!!!, inga tadya mari total expenditure yanga iri $2,50.

mari wasu bhazi

panouya vanhu kuzo bata maoko

Vamwe baba vakati vava kufa, vakati regai ndiraire mwana zvokuita parufu pachauya vanhu vachibata maoko.

Panouya mapostori, uvige sugar,

Pachauya veAnglican uvige doro ,

Pachauya veMethodist uvige nyama ,

Panouya maPentecost uvige mari,

Panouya veEndtime (Gumbura) uvige amai vako.

mari mapositori baba mwana gumbura church rufu pentecostal

Dzimba Dzakaoma!

Dzimba dzakaoma vakomana.Ndakazviwanira zvangu babie rangu raive steady ndikati regai ndiroore hangu.Takabva taita kamwana kwedu.Sezvo mari yainetsa mukadzi akati otsvaga basa tibatsirane.Pasina nguva ndakanzwa mukadzi oti awana basa pane imwe lodge.Zvakadaro takabva tatama kubva pamba yevabereki tave kuno lodger kweduwo sezvo mari yakanga yave kubatana manje.Problem yakazouya pandakati regai ndirovere chipikiri chekuisa picture frame.Aaa ndakatambura coz madziro ainge akaoma iwayo.Ndipo pandakaona kuti Dzimba dzakaoma.

mari baba mai imba roja

mari yembwa

Just imagine uriwe unganzwa sei...

Toti une imbwa yako ine zvimbwanana, wobva wazvitengesa. Wosheedza shamwari yako monodya mari iya. Shamwari yako yadhakwa yotanga kudeedzera ichiti, "todya mari yembwa..!!!"

mari imbwa

kambo kaya kanonzi "Tapinda Tapinda"

Dj : hello muteereri , wapinda muchirongwa .

Caller: maita vamushamarari, ndine chiziviso. Ndanhongawo bhegi rine chitupa chakanzi Bryan Dzukwa rine mari inoita $300 000

DJ: Hoo maita basa, saka manga muchida kuti muvaudze kwavanokwanisa kukuwanai here.

Caller: Aiwa, maya. Ndanga ndichida kuti mundiridzirewo kambo kaya kanonzi Tapinda Tapinda.!!!

mari tapinda tapinda

Vakomana chirungu chakaoma!

Vamwe bhudhi vaitengesa mavegetables kumarket. Kwakauya murungu akathenga neR100 manje bhudhi Havana change.

Bhudhi kwakuti kumurungu money is together murungu akati what?

Bhudhi vakati money is meeting, murungu akati: I don't understand.

Bhudhi vakati money is mixed murungu kwakuti I can't get you

Bhudhi vakati money is in a relationship, murungu akati come again

Bhudhi vakati money is joined murungu akati please explain

Bhudhi vakati money is one. Murungu akati I beg your pardon

Bhudhi vakati: R1 is here R2 is here R5 is here R10 is here R20 is here R50 is here achinongedzera R100) akati they are the team.

mari dofo chirungu

huya tiverenge mari

Murume: Huya kuno

Mukadzi: Kunei

Murume: ita zvandataura bvisa bhurugwa

Mukadzi: Ndabvisa

Murume: Chiuya pano pamubhedha

Mukadzi: Ndauya

Murume: Chindibatsirawo kuwerenga mari

Mukadzi: Saka bhurungwa rangu ndabvisirei

Murume: Ungazondibira mari yangu uchiisa mubhurugwa

mari mukadzi bhedhuru bhurugwa murume

Zvidhura zvema dhora ku Binga

Umwe mface aiita zvekugadzira zvidhuura zvemaUS$. Imwe weekend akagadzira zvidhuura zvema$18 achibva ati regai ndiende nazvo kumachonyonyo ekuBinga achiti havangamboziva kuti hakuna $18 yakabatana.

Akasvikopinda mune kamwewo kashop maitengeswa nekachembere achibva aburitsa $18 yake yakabatana ndokutti, "Maswera here gogo, ndanga ndichikumbirawo change."

Gogaz vakatambira mari ndobva vangoitarisa mbichana vachibva vanyemwerera vachiti, "Ndokupa ari ma$9 maviri here kana kuti ma$6 matatu........."

mari mbavha Kungwara

kare kwanga kwaka chipa

Zvinhu zvakanga zvakanaka kare. Mdhara aiudza hake vazukuru vake how in the old days he could go kumaShop nedhora achinouya ne 2 loafs, chisaga chemaPotatoe, gaba reJam, tsapo yemaSweets ne kaShuga..

Asi zvamazuvaano hazvichaiti, too many security cameras muzvitoro!

mari mbavha chitoro

kare mari yaitenga chaizvo!

Unonzwa vakuru vachiti kare mari yaitenga chaizvo! Ende zvinhu zvanga zvakanaka! Asi chinoshamisa ndechekuti unonzwa vachiti taienda kuchikoro nemangayi, maheu, kudya sadza nemhodzi dzemanhanga...

Unotoshaya kuti mari yacho yaitenga mangayi here.

mari nhamo gore rezvidzidzo

Ndakatengesa madomasi

Interviewer: VaChiyangwa, makazvigona sei kuti musvike kuita millionaire?

Phillip Chiyangwa: Ndakarima madomasi 1 million ndikamatengesa dhora dhora.

mari Phillip Chiyangwa

Mazhanke imarii - rand, bond coin

Me: Mazhanje imari

Vendor: 5rand

Me: Oyi 5rand

Vendor: Sorry hatitore Rand

Me: But mati 5Rand

Vendor: 5rand yemaBond!

mari nhamo bond coin rand

Benzi richida kuteng juzi

Benzi rakapinda mushop richida juzi reblack, rakapinda mushop ndokuti: "ndirikuda jersey reblack". Zvikanzi nemutengesi: "tine rebrown ingoritora uwudze moyo wako kuti iblack".

Zvikanzi nebenzi "zvakanaka, imarii ?"
Mutengesi achiba ati: "i$20". Benzi rakabva raburitsa $5 rikati: "uwudzewo moyo wako kuti i$20"

mari benzi

Civil Servants - Yapinda here babe?

Nhasi ukanzwa murume nemukadzi vachibvunzana kuti yapinda here babe? Usavhunduka, Ipay yemu civil servants irikurehwa

mari mukomana musikana civil servants civil servants 2015

Ndatambira

Musikana akaona whatsapp status yemufesi wake yakanzi ndatambira. chinzwa conversation pakati pevaviri:

Thelma: Hello hun

Majid: Wakudei inga wanga usingachade zvekutaura neni?

Thelma: Im sorry hun 4n yangu yaishandiswa nesister yangu. Saka toita sei zvawatambira sweet?

Majid: Toenda kurufu ndatambira shoko rekuti hanzi sekuru vashaya

Thelma: Usandikwidze hasha makuseni ano, zivai zvekuisa pastatus

mari mukomana musikana valentines day

Nhaka

Mudhara Paul on his death bed surrounded by his 2 sons, a daughter, wife and nurse.

First born son you will have Joina City,

Second son, you will have Eastgate mall

Rosey my lovely daughter you will have Eastlea residential

Wife you will have Borrowdale Brooke

And the nurse said your husband is a good man he worked for something and he now lives you rich

Wife says kwaaniko!! he is a milk delivery guy arikutisiira kwekutengesera mukaka.....

mari mhuri nhaka

Masasi ekupenga - Munyama chaiwo

Hameno kuti munyama here kana kuti chii...ndanhonga Mari but yakashota

mari masasi ekupenga

Ungazondibira mari yangu

Murume: huyakuno

mukadzi: kuzodii?

Murume: itazvanda taura

mukadzi: ndauya

murume: bvisa bhurugwa

mukadzi: ndabvisa

murume: chiuya pano pamubhedha

mkadzi: ndauya

murume: ndibatsire kuverenga mari yangu iyi

mkadzi: saka ndozvandabvisira bhurugwa rangu

murume: ehe ungangondibira imwe uchiisa mubhurugwa.

mari mukadzi murume

Roora - mkwasha asina mari

Tezvara: Gogoi $10, Makandinzwa nani $10, Matekenya ndebvu $120, Vhuramuromo $300. Chimbobvisai iyoyo mkwasha tichazotaura imwe nekufamba kwenguva.

Mkwasha: Ndafamba ndisina mari baba ndati ndimbonzwa ma price.

Tezvara: Urikuti kudii nhai Sinyoro?

Mkwasha: Ndati ndauya kuzotora ma price chete mukaona ndati zii moziva kuti maprice akanyanya.

Tezvara: Wati kudii? Chibuda uende kumba kwako! Ndozvawatiunganidzira pano tichisiya mabasa? buda!! Kamani out!

Mkwasha: (rambei akati shikiriri kugara akatsikitsira).

Tezvara: Uchiri wakagarirei ndati buda!

Mkwasha: handina mari yebhazi

mari roora mukwasha tezvara nhamo

Kunetsa kwemari mugore ra 2016

Mari yanetsa but Vanoda easy access to their funds vhurai account neNMB...

And you can withdraw any amount that you want, no questions asked..

No bank charges!

National Mattress Bank unongoisa mari yako pasi peMattress

mari reserve bank of zimbabwe cash shortage 2016

Sabhuku nemusikana wavo mudhorobha

Sabhuku vakasangana nemusikana wavo mutown. Havo nyengu muneimwe shop. Kababy kabva kati "ndirikuda handbag iyo but manje ndakanganwa mari yangu kumba.pliiiizzzzzz do something."

Sabhuku: Ok. Ririkuita marii bag racho handisi kuona paneprice

Baby: Ririkuita $65 igenuine leather.

Sabhuku vakaburitsa wallet yavo. Ndakaona chibaby

chakuswedera padhuze chichivapuruzira. Vakabva aburitsa bond coin (50 cents) ndokupa chibaby

Sabhuku: Mhanya kumba undotora mari yacho yawakanganwa.

mari sabhuku musikana dhorobha

Ndadonhedza mari - kutuma mwana wepa next door

Ndamuka ndine coin rangu, Ndabva ndatumira kumwana kepanext kunonditengera half loaf, ndakaona kachidzoka kasina chingwa asi kachidya yoghurt.

Hanzi ndadonhedza coin renyu ndichienda Saka pakudzoka ndabva ndanhongawo rangu ndikabva ndatenga yoghurt

mari chingwa mwana next door musikanzwa

Tamba - Wadiwa Bond Note

Reserve Bank
P.O Box MY 123456789
Money Way
Bank

Wadiwa Bond Note

Ndanyora ino tsamba kuti ndikuzivisevo kuti pano pauri kuda kuuya pabarika, huye US dollar ndiye achiri hake pamoyo womurume! Vana pula, pound, euro, yen naana metcazh vakatowoneka havo vakatodzokera vasati vasakadzwa.

Ini ndakambotsungirira asi zvino ndapfidza hangu, ndangogarira vana vangu! Ko ndichaendepi ndachembedzwa kudai?

Zvino huya hako wakagadzirira. Murume wawada unema domestic violence anotyisa chose. Haatye! Kana mapurisa aakutomutyawo. Saka wotosimba zvako.

Ndini wako akarambwa

Rand

mari reserve bank of zimbabwe us dollar rand nhamo 2016 bond notes

Madaidzirwo oita vana baba mazuva ano

Mazuva ano varume vakudaidzwa nekuwana:

$1000 zvichikwidza: Honey.
$700 - $900: Sweetheart
$400 - $600: Daddy.
$200 - $300: Baba Bee, Baba Vee etc...
$100 - $190: Mhofu, Dhewa, Shumba, Mukanya etc...
$100 zvichi dzika: Madzibaba, Munhu washe etc...

mari baba nhamo rudo Madzibaba mutupo nhamo 2016

Mhando dzevakadzi ne mari

Kune mhando dzevakadzi dzakati wandei, panoti

Zim dollar - ava vakadzi vakavimbika uye vasingadi nevarume vavo, they are very supportive.
Bearer cheque - aapa pane nyaya, unogona kubva kubasa ukawana aenda zvake, atoExpire, hapana zviripo.
US-Dollar - uyu haabve pamurume zvekumhanya, asi shanje, shanje kani, asi uuuum inhamo zvayo.
Bond-coin - apa ndopane nyaya, vanochengeta asi value yavo ndeyefake, ukasanyatsoona unoti wawana mukadzi asi hapana hapana.
Bond-note - haaaaa uyu mukadzi ane zvivindi, haadiwe asi anotouya chete. Kuvhundutsira pamusha, haatye kana munhu. Anotuka varidzi vepamba iye asati ambogarapo. Nembwa dzinotomuziva asati asvika.

mari bond coin reserve bank of zimbabwe us dollar zim dollar nhamo 2016 bond notes zim bearer cheque

Ma bond anetsa paZimbabwe

Bond Meat - Ma chunks
Bond Car - Mahindra
Bond Chicken - Cabbage
Bond Fish - Matemba
Bond Job - Kutengesa bhero nechiVendor
Bond Friends - AnaJudas
Bond Wife - Smallhouse
Bond Girlfriend - 1 nyt stand or pfambi/hure
Bond Licence - Provisional Licence
Bond Passport - ETD
Bond House - Lodge
Bond Milk - My Creamer/Cremots
Bond Phone - Gtide

Zvimwe wopedzisa wega wave munhu mukuru aarrggh nhai

Bond Prophet - ...
Bond Church - ....
Bond Nation - ....

mari hure reserve bank of zimbabwe bond notes

Bond Notes - ko naira nekwacha?

Hanzi heee bond harishande kunze... Heee bond zvakati zvikazoti.

Ko iro Kwacha rinomboshanda kunze kupi?

Meticash inoshanda kunze kupi?

Naira chairo rinoshanda kunze kupi ?

Bond ndiro ramunoda kuti ritenge kunze nekuti raita sei?

MUKWANE!

mari reserve bank of zimbabwe nhamo 2016 bond notes

Bond Notes - tsumo

Hedzinoi tsumo dzema Bond Notes:

...................................................................

Ane kwacha ane mari hazvienzane neane bond
charovedzera charovedzera bond rakapinda muZimbabwe kwakachena
Igaroziva kuti bond haricrosse boarder
Mudzimu wakupa bond wati nhunzi dzikudye
Ane bond peta muswe kuti ane US Dollar akutye
Aive ma bearer ave mabond
Matakadya US Dollar haanyaradze uyo akabata bond
Kure kwe US Dollar ndiko kusina bond
Kudada kwevari America kukumbira vari Zimbabwe Bond
Akupa US Dollar ndewako .

mari tsumo reserve bank of zimbabwe us dollar bond notes zim bearer cheque

Masasi ekubatsirana - mari yeku snake park

Hanzi unotoona munhu achiwana time yekunoona nyoka ku snake park asi achishaya nguva yekunoona vabereki kumusha. Vanhu itai mushe imi.

mari mwana masasi vabereki nyoka

Zvinoreva eco wepana ecocash

Ukataura chinhu mubako kana muhova panoita maungira.

Rinenge riri voice rako haro rinenge richidairira , asi hausi iwe unenge uchiri kutaura.

Phenomenon iyi Varungu vanoiti "Echo".

Kana unemari muAccount asi usinga kwanisi kuiita Cash-Out. Inenge iri mari yako hayo asi hausiriwe unenge wakaibata.

Now i understand why VaMasiwa vakaiti inonzi "Eco"-Cash.

....Maungira emaDhora.

mari ecocash reserve bank of zimbabwe nhamo 2016 bond notes

Zvinhu zvinoratidza kuti hawusati wava nemari

12 Things that will let you know kuti hausati waita mari, imbodzikama.
1. Ukaona uchivhunduka murungu
2. Ukaona uchiri kutenga mu shop/supermarket inobvunzwa receipt pa door
3. Ukaona mu Phone yako musina kana one message ya teacher na headmaster vemwana wako.
4. Ukaona uchigara imba ine ma burglar bars
5. Ukaona uchigara muimba ine sitting room inedoor rinonanga mu main bedroom
6. Ukaona uchidyira mu sitting room uyezve mumba mako musina dining room ne table yacho.
7. Ukaona une musikana webasa one uyezve ari iye anoita futi zve garden nekugeza mota
8. Ukaona uchidira fuel ye $5 zvichidzika
9. Ukaona mumba menyu muchidya type one yenyama pa meal uyezve muchidya more than 1 loaf pa Zuva. Chingwa hachifanire kuwanda kudarika zvinoiswa pakati pechingwa.
10. Ukaona kwaunogara kusingawanikwe ma billboards e perfume
11. Ukaona uchi scratcher airtime kuti u juice
12. Ukaona bank manager asina phone number yako mu phone make.

mari

Bond Notes: Mazita anoenderana nenguva yatiri

Kune wachangobara kana warikutarisira, hawo maazita anofambirana nenguva:

Bondnashe
Tawanabond
Tabondwa
Bondmore
Bondwell
Bondelina
Bondlyn
Bondikelelo
Tabondzwa
Takubondwa
SimbanaBond
Bondknows
Bondfree
Bondward
Bondson
Bondington

mari bond coin reserve bank of zimbabwe zita bond notes

Bond Notes - kukumbira mari

Yedu yekukumbira Mari pagroup re family iyi, nhasi ndati kunamai vaMadam vangu Mhamha ndokumbirawo 'bond' foni yangu yabva yanyora 'bonde' vanhu vese vari kupopota. Ndabva ndabudiswa mugroup.

mari ambuya bonde bond notes

Bond Notes: kubuda color

Zvenyu zvekut munowerenga Mari uchiisa mate pachigunwe zvapera!! Ku Bond note chigunwe chosara chiri Green kunge wanga uchitemha Nyevhe

mari reserve bank of zimbabwe bond notes nyevhe

Bhadharai ndikuudzei akarara mubhedhuru

Hanzi nekamwana kuna daddy vako vabva kubasa after 2 months vasipo. Nhai daddy ndikakuudzai akasara achirara mubedroom namama munondipei? zvikanzi $5, zvikanzi ishoma, baba ndokupa mwana $50. Mkomana ndokutyorera muhomwe zvikanzi ndini hangu.

mari bhedhuru baba mwana