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Makawandisa, hamukwani!

President Robert Mugabe visited Chinoz at his one-roomed house & he knocked on the door.
Chinoz: Ndiyani ?
RGM: I am his excellency; the head of state and gvt; the commander in chief of the Zimbabwe defence forces; the chancellor of all state universities; the first and permanent secretary of revolutionary party  of zanu pf, the father of Chatunga, the most educated president in the world and the president of the republic of zimbabwe, cde Robert Gabriel Mugabe.
Chinoz: ah makawandisa hamukwani ndine nzvimbo yemunhu one chete!

ibola egedini

Reporter: nhai vaChinoz munoti kudiiko ne Ebola irikuda kupinda munyika? 
Chinoz: haa mfana yakapinda kare kare, ndiyo yaingonzi nanavaMugabe nepa T.V pose kuti IBOLA EGEDIN

phone yakadonha woseka asi...

Phone yako ikadonha worwadziwa asi President wako akadonha woseka ...... shame

musango donha donha

Hanzi pane mufesi asungwa aonekwa achidonha mutwn akanzi ukutedzera president

Gore Rezvidzidzo - akarwa hondo ndiyani

So, akarwa hondo yekusunungura Zimbabwe ndiyani?

Mujuru haana kudonhedza chikopokopo,

Didymus Mutasa haana kurwa hondo ayive busy with his wife in Mozambique,

Munangagwa was in Zambia studying, 

Mugabe was teaching in Ghana

Iro gore rino tichadzidza zvakawanda

Bhavhadheyi rako unosheya nani

Ndeupi wauno sheya naye mwedzi wawakazvarwa nawo apa?
January - Magaya
February- R.Mugabe
March - Tsvangirai
Aprill - Gumbura
May- Marabha
June - Mai Chisamba
July - Jah Praizah
August - Chinotimba
September - Macheso
October - Zhakata
November - Vharazipi
December - Makandiwa

Then wauno share naye ndoyava nickname yako!

Zvinhu zvisingachataurwi nemazita muZimbabwe

Zvinhu zvisingachataurwi nemazita muZimbabwe:

  • Aenda - Magetsi
  • Adzoka - Magetsi
  • Haisi kubuda - Mvura
  • irikunetsa - Network
  • Yarohwa futi - Chelsea
  • Adonha futi - Mugabe

Motorcade yemutungamiri wenyika yeZimbabwe

Chinoz and his son vachifamba vakaona ndege
Son: asi indege ya presdent kani?
Chinoz: dai yanga iri ya presdent waona zvimudhudhudhu mberi.

Tsoro yavakutyisa!

Kutamba draft/tsoro is now a criminal offence mushure mekunge masoja eku cranbone anzwikwa achidaidzira kuti "uraya bhobho, ukauraya bhobho tinenge tapinda". 
Vari kurohwa pasi petsoka kutaura kuno, kuti vataure kuti vakatumwa nani kuzouraya mukuru wenyika. Chitotambai henyu chess!

Masasi eku penga - Satani naMugabe

Satan akaonekwa achichema ndokunzi newewo munhu weutsinye unotochemawo? 
Zvikanzi naSatan zvimwe zvinhu zvinoitwa naMugabe zvinongonzi ndini!

vasikana musasvora ma teacher

Askana musashore munhu kana asati aane mari muchiti moda vakomana vane mari. Rimwe gore umwe muskana akaramba Robert Gabriel Mugabe achiti ma teacher haana mari, nanhasi paanonzwa sirene yemotorcade anozvirova mbama.

Masasi ekupenga - Surprise birthday ku state house

Guys ...pane vakasununguka here tiende tinoita surprise birthday party ya President ku state house

Chero nemi mungati munhu angaite makore anenenge total time yebhora plus injury time

Nemi tinoti Refereee (Ref) ngaachiridza *pito* 

Mugabe @ 93 - wish you many more

A quick reminder hama dzangu. Gumirai pa "Happy birthday to you...."
Zvaana "wish you many more..." siyanai nazvo amana! Munotikuvadzisa....

Masasi ekupenga - mwana anonzi Robert

Ukapa mwana achangobva mukuzvarwa zita kuti Robert, haasi anozokunetsa kumubvisa pamukaka here?

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