Chimwe chisikana chidofo dofo, changa chakazvipengera nekunaka, chaka wana 5 out of 100 pasvomhu!!
Murairidzi, uyo aiva munhurume, ndokunyora mubhuku kuti "SEE ME!!" achiti achibatsire. Asi chisikana chiya chakatofunga hacho zverudo, ndokunyorawo reply mubhuku imomo chichiti:
"Hapana muuyu unovinga shiri!!! Iwe huya undione.... Kana uri serious nezvangu!!"
Vamwe baba vakadaidaidzwa kuinterview.Musi weinterview waka svika.So he woke up early for the interview.Vakasvika about 15 minute earlier.Vakatambirwa nekasecretary kechinose,zvikanzi asecretary "good morning sir,what can I do 4 yu?"Blaz vheti yaivanetsa zvakaipisisa,vakabva vapindura vachiti Morning,I have come for intervals.Secretary akabva aseka zvakabhowa blaz,blaz vakange vatobvisa maglaz emaziso vaisa patable yasecretary nekubhowekana vakabva vasimuka zvimwe zvechiramwa zviye zviye apa amnga muri muninth floor.By the time akasvika paground floor akabva afeeler kuti akanganwa maglaz ake.So he went back kuna secretary.Secretary ndokuti Oooh sir yu have come back again.Sekuru ndokuti well I have forgotten my testicles
Mambo vakakokorodza vanhu vakati "Anenge abvisa shumba zino rayo ndiye achabvisawo mwana wangu humhandara."
Shumba yanga yakavharirwa mumba mazuva mashanu isina kudya. Majaya emudunhu
akaedza vese vakafiramo. Mambo akadaidzira kuparara kwemusangano. Kamwewo kamudhara kaitobva kumunda kakabvunza zvaiitika kakanzi kana muchida pindai muneshumba umo kakatsanangurirwa katove mukati.
After 10 minutes dze noise nekuchema mudhara akabuda sweating and tired zvikanzi, "Shumba ndabvisa humhandara musikana anoda kubviswa zino arikupi?"
Mukadzi anga arimu court achibvunzwa kuti atsanangure munhu anga amubata chibharo sezvo ma suspects ese aivemo airamba. Mukadzi ndokuti 'munhu wacho anga arimupfupi, anemhanza, anonhuwa.
Mwana muClass:
"Sir, ko tika mixer Omo ne Surf washing powder panobuda furo here?
Teacher: "Yes panobuda furo, handidi zvikubvunzwa zvisina basa makuseni so mhani"
Mwana achizevezera munzveve yeClassmate yake: "What a stupid answer panoita furo cei isu tisati taisa mvura UMMMM TICHAFOIRA GORE RINO"
Tsamba kumukwasha.
Anodiwa mukwasha Todd.Ndinotenda chose negirosari ramakatitengera bt mukaka uya unonzi Handy Andy watikuwadza nemanyoka tinovimba kt mudumbu mavhunduka chirungu, hupfu huya hunonzi Vim hausi kutsengeka zvakanaka asi totenda kuti wakati mbembe kuchena, madhuringi anonzi Sunlight irikupupuma neMukwa haasi kutapira takutowedzera shuga, kozoita tsotso dziya dzinonzi Spaghetti dziri kunanauka ukadziisa pachoto.
SIPHO: When days are duck, friends are few.
NHLANHLA: Oh My Gosh he boat me flours.
AYANDA: Let me bath the dishes before l sleep.
SIYA: Who case if Kanye Weist is dating Kim Quatation.
NTOKOZO: I'm my mothers only female daughter.
NTOMBI: I miss my Mom and Dead shem.
LEBO: Life is too short to hold garages.
KAY: Eish, I have chest pains all over my body.
SINDI: I meat her after school.
Zimsec 2014
Shona Paper 2
Rondedzero : Akarumwa neChokuchera
Chekuchera chinoruma vakomana. Mukoma aichera pasi ndobva pabuda chekuchera iye ndokutanga kutiza, akamhanya akamhanya akamhanya wanikwe chekuchera chiri kungouya. Vanhu vakatora matemo asi chekuchera hachina kutya,chikati naaaye .Mukoma achida kunoti nzvee nechikwere chehuku ndiye ngaaa kurumwa.. Vanhu vachisvika wanei Aah, arumwa nechekuchera.
Nezuro ndakatengera musikana wangu we kuMasvingo maruva. Ndikamatumidzira pabhazi. Nhasi ndawana tsamva kubva kwaari:
"Thanks daddy neka type ke Vheji kamakatitumira,kakaipa mudovi"